Steps to Find the Authentic YOU

How do we find the most authentic version of ourselves?

There’s a power in authenticity that many of us overlook in the whirlwind of life. As a woman, it was hard to dig through to that version of myself. Not because men are more authentic than women or any of that hoopla. As women, we wear so many hats—partner, mother, daughter, friend, professional, caretaker, worrier, homemaker, and so much more. In the midst of all these roles, it’s easy to lose sight of who we are at our core. Authenticity isn’t about perfection or having it all figured out; it’s about showing up as you.

During the holiday season I always take a 2 week hiatus where I slow my business down to soak in memories with my family, take a mental health recovery, and realign. I thought a lot about how we become this version of ourselves. So here’s my 7 tips to start the journey to uncovering the most authentic version of yourself.

1. Silence the Noise

The world is loud. It constantly tells us who we should be, what we should want, and how we should look. Take intentional moments of stillness—whether that’s through meditation, journaling, or simply sitting quietly with your thoughts. When the external noise fades, your inner voice becomes louder. Listen to it.

2. Reconnect With What Lights You Up

When was the last time you did something that made your heart race with excitement or filled you with peace? As children, we instinctively pursue what we love, but adulthood often shifts our focus to responsibilities. Revisit your passions, even if they seem small or “unproductive.” Whether it’s painting, dancing, or hiking, those moments of joy are breadcrumbs leading you to your true self.

3. Embrace Your Flaws

Authenticity isn’t about being flawless; it’s about embracing the imperfections that make you human. Own your quirks, your awkward laugh, or your tendency to cry during commercials. Those traits are uniquely yours, and they’re beautiful.

4. Ask Yourself the Tough Questions

Who am I when no one is watching? What do I believe in? What kind of life do I want to build? These questions can be uncomfortable, but they’re essential. Be honest with yourself, even if the answers surprise or scare you.

5. Let Go of People-Pleasing

Many of us, especially women, have been conditioned to prioritize others’ happiness over our own. But authenticity requires boundaries. It’s okay to say no. It’s okay to disappoint people. Prioritizing your truth isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.

6. Surround Yourself With People Who See You

Find those who celebrate your realness—the messy, vibrant, unapologetic you. These are the people who encourage you to be yourself, not because of what you offer them, but because they see and love your essence.

7. Celebrate Growth

The most authentic version of yourself isn’t stagnant. As you evolve, so will your truth. Give yourself grace as you grow. What felt right five years ago might not resonate now, and that’s okay. Authenticity is a journey, not a destination.

All in all, being authentic doesn’t mean everyone will understand or approve of you—and that’s the beauty of it. Authenticity is freeing because it allows you to stop performing and start living. You are enough just as you are. The world needs your unique light, so let it shine unapologetically.